Retirement & Send Off Poems

This is a poem that was written to send off a very left wing school teacher:

Next term in 1983
We'll take our break time cups of tea
And clinking spoons and polite talk
("I've signed for lunch because it's pork")
Is all that will assault the ear
Disruption then will disappear.

Minds tired of teaching stupid boys
Will hear no disconcerting noise
Of voices raised in loud debate
Considering the dreadful Fate
Of Britain under Maggie T
Of holocausts for you and me
Of all the host of social ills
If we don't exercise our wills

For all that chaos – do not weep
We now can all go back to sleep
The Roar that chased us up and down
Now lashes Chipping Campden town
A distant rumble's all that's heard
We are not troubled by one word!
The thunder storm has passed away
And lightning strikes another day.

Relax! Fear not! And go to do
All that you always wanted to!
Now we have no bright red Rory
We can confess to voting Tory!
Put back the queen upon the wall
It doesn't bother me at all!

Stiffen the arm and flex the cane
And beat the little brats again.
Nor shall we suffer all that shame
When pupils use our Christian name
The right address we shall prefer
When everybody calls us "Sir".

A proper dignity throughout shall reign
O'Sullivan! Oh what a pain!
Anaesthetized we all shall be
In the Christmas term of '83
The patient school will then be numb
And every spirit deaf and dumb.

© Richard Elgood 1983

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